Imagine you are Quentin Tarantino, the director of the most stylish movies in Western cinema. So stylish are your films that your involvement in them is immediately identifiable simply by their fine blend of engaging dialogue mixed effortlessly with blood-thirsty, bone crunching violence, almost rendering marketing campaigns unnecessary.
Imagine you are going to tackle the most notable event in modern political history – World War Two – as the subject matter for your next film.
When approaching the film, would you study the history books documenting the events before, during and after the time period between 1939 and 1945 – books that have been poured over by a vast swathe of directors before you? Of course you would, knowledge is the bomb. But, would you ignore them and just make one of the funniest films of the year out of one of the most melancholy topics at hand simply because you are Quentin Tarantino and you – and only you – can do so?
Of course you would.
Here you can stop imagining, because the real Quentin is far ahead of you.
The eponymous heroes of the attractively misspelt Inglourious Basterds are a band of Jewish-American soldiers sent into Nazi-occupied France to strike fear, and premature death, into the Third Reich by engaging them in an Apache Indian inspired guerrilla resistance. The leader of this Band of Badass Brothers is Lieutenant Aldo Raine, played impeccably by Brad Pitt. It would be a gross understatement to say that the Second World War was tense, but Tarantino somehow manages to crank up the intensity, leaving recovering nail-biters’ efforts in jagged, bleeding tatters. In this environment, Raine’s country charm and ruthless treatment of Nazi soldiers make him immediately likable. His ability to have fun and enjoy ‘dee-stroying’ Nazis force the audience into a nicotine-like craving for his surprisingly rare appearances.
An equally notable performance is that of Austrian born actor, Christoph Waltz, who plays Colonel Hans Landa, also known as ‘The Jew Hunter’ – a vicious wolf in a sheep’s clothing, that is if the sheep was itself dressed up as Rob Brydon. The dialogue of most characters in Inglourious Basterds is typically excellent, but Waltz and Pitt must count themselves as the lucky pair. Much of the conversation in the film is spoken in foreign languages, showing that Tarantino has avoided the terrible blunder of having French and German people speak English all of the time, thereby providing the film with a touch of authenticity and class. Such is the director’s level of respect to languages other than the behemoth of English that British actor Michael Fassbender’s character, Lieutenant Archibald Hicox, almost has his true identity unearthed due to his strange German accent when posing as a Nazi officer. Although some may ignorantly describe the subtitle approach as nothing but a moving picture book, the film benefits considerably from enforcing such a level of concentration upon the audience, because when the action comes (you never doubted for a second that it would, did you?) it is so sudden and explosive that those aforementioned nail-biters run the risk of swallowing their hand.
Like most QT productions, a suspension of disbelief is a must with this film. History doesn't just get blurred, it gets opaqued with a brand new version, so only then can you watch Inglourious Basterds and see it for the hilarious, intelligent action romp that it is.
Inglourious Basterds is the war movie you wish would have come on during those numerous rainy Sundays, before Antique’s Roadshow carried out a sluggish assault on your eyes and ears with a barrage of sentimentality for overvalued old tat. See this film and you will see Quentin Tarantino pick up the hot potato of the Second World War, strap it with TNT and blow it to smithereens, without an oven glove in sight.
Thursday 27 August 2009
Wednesday 19 August 2009
Why are British troops fighting in Afghanistan?
On Saturday the death toll of British soldiers serving in Afghanistan reached another dreaded milestone. Private Richard Hunt, 21, of 2nd Battalion The Royal Welsh sadly succumbed to the injuries he sustained on 13 August when an explosion hit the vehicle patrol he had been part of in Musa Qaleh in the Helmand province of Afghanistan. Despite the best efforts of staff at the Royal Centre of Defence Medicine in Selly Oak, Private Hunt became the 200th British soldier to die as a result of the conflict in Afghanistan. Since his death the British media has seemingly doubled its efforts to cover the events taking place in the Middle East.
Now that the coverage has begun to approach a level that soldiers, and indeed the general public, can be happy with, the general public are bound to form an, or adapt their, opinion on it.
A day prior to Private Hunt’s death, Sky News conducted a survey, in association with YouGov, which showed that of 2,000 adults asked about the war in Afghanistan, 35% (the majority) indicated that it is not very clear why British troops are fighting out there, while an added 20% believed that it is not clear at all. An interesting contradiction was highlighted when the same poll gave results that show 57% of those questioned are opposed to British troops fighting in Afghanistan, more than twice the number of those who believe a British presence there is justified. The results of this poll conducted last week only go to show that a scarily high percentage of British citizens do not know why there is a British presence in Afghanistan but still oppose it. Where is the sense in that?
There must be a clearly identifiable reason. If the debacle of the Iraq war taught the Labour party anything, it was that the British people will not be duped into supporting an unjustifiable war ever again. Fool us once; shame on you, fool us twice; shame on us. Hence Shadow Defence Secretary Dr Liam Fox’s recent letter to Defence Secretary Bob Ainsworth which “demands clarification on [the] British mission in Afghanistan”. This letter, as noble a gesture as it may seem, stinks of another Conservative effort to further embarrass Labour, were it to be revealed that we have another WMD scenario on our hands, thereby making the Tories look better by default, and may not actually provide the people of Britain with the information they so desperately need and deserve.
So, why are British troops fighting in Afghanistan?
There are a handful of recent historical events that proffer such questions as ‘Where were you when...?’ and the like. If that ellipsis were to be replaced by just three numbers and one small slice of punctuation though, almost all of us would be able to blurt out an answer which seemingly shows that while planes were crashing and thousands of people were dying, we were going about our daily business in blissful ignorance.
The section of the Ministry Defence website entitled ‘Operations in Afghanistan: Background Briefing 1’ begins with the following: ‘Following the terrorist attacks on Washington and New York on 11 September 2001…’ And that is why Britain became involved in Afghanistan. Our nation stood shoulder to shoulder with the US as it looked to react to the awful events that took place on 9/11.
Much of us are easily convinced that retaliating to the terrorist attacks on the World Trade Centre and the Pentagon is more than enough reason to justify British troops being in Afghanistan. However, factions of the general public will be quick to point out that we don’t need to get involved in ‘someone else’s fight’ (that quote is so common in conversations about British military endeavours in recent history that it is approaching being categorised as cliché). These people would be well reminded of another date infamous enough to be granted with a numerical moniker supposed to encapsulate all connotations of pain, destruction and death caused by evil – 7 July 2005, the day of the London terrorist attacks. Also, in talk held with the intelligence of conversation usually reserved for drunken pub chat, the US is often accused of only getting involved in the Second World War when the country felt the effects of it on a personal level, with the Japanese attack on Pearl Harbour. A fine display of hypocrisy it is then to say that the British reaction to 9/11 was not justified.
That reaction was the beginning of Operation Veritas, a campaign against international terrorism, initialised with the identification of denying Al Qaida a base in Afghanistan, denying them an alternative base elsewhere, attacking Al Qaida internationally, and supporting other states in their efforts against Al Qaida as the four main goals of the operation.
In November 2001, the Royal Marines from 40 Commando became the first British troops sent into Afghanistan and were quickly followed by a large battle group based around Royal Marines from 45 Commando. Their role as Task Force Jacana was to ‘deny and destroy terrorist infrastructure and interdict the movement of Al Qaida in eastern Afghanistan’, more broadly, they were part of a US-led coalition force designed to dislodge the Taliban which was sheltering Al Qaida. This aim was quickly fulfilled. By the end of the year the Taliban had collapsed. Those who remained were forced into retreating to the Pushtan province of southern Afghanistan and Pakistani tribal areas. However, international forces remained in Afghanistan to prevent the country from falling back into the hands of those seeking to use it as a hotbed for the grooming of potential terrorists, thereby providing much needed stability. While present in Afghanistan, British forces were given the tasks of seeking out hidden factions of the Taliban and Al Qaida and training Afghan security forces to defend their own country against such threats.
So, the original reason for the British troops being in Afghanistan was to help get rid of Al Qaida and the Taliban, but having done that, simply deciding to cut and run was not, and is still not, an option, as this would leave Afghanistan open for resurgent enemy forces to reclaim. Therefore, the aim now is to protect Afghanistan and allow the nation to become self-sustaining, stable and, most importantly to NATO, democratic.
As Afghanistan gears up to the elections this week, only the second time they have voted for a leader in their history, British forces will play a huge part in making sure they go smoothly. The establishment of a democracy in Afghanistan is the most crucial goal for the International Security Assistance Force (ISAF) that the United Kingdom currently contributes approximately 9,000 troops towards. However, a democracy is not a desirable situation for all, especially the Taliban, who initially enjoyed popularity when coming to prominence in the country in 1994 but have, of course, since been driven out and reduced to insurgency.
When British forces moved into the Taliban stronghold of Helmand in 2006 they were met with brutal resistance, in the form of head-on attacks, straight away. Three years on, soldiers no longer have to face such bold tactics, but instead face the constant threat of Improvised Explosive Devices (IEDs). IEDs are morally degrading for the ISAF troops because they are hard to find and extremely lethal, but still cheap and easy for the enemy to produce, giving the Taliban the option of laying ten IEDs in the hope that just one will devastate a British patrol. Soldiers also face the added problem of identifying the Taliban insurgents amongst the civilians they come across.
With these facts in mind, the question on everyone’s lips should not be about why British troops are fighting in Afghanistan, but instead how much longer they must do so. On this subject the Chief of General Staff (head of the Army) General Sir David Richards has said that “the whole process might take as long as 30 to 40 years” when speaking earlier this month. Although he went on to say that the number of troops British forces contribute during that time will not always be as high as the current amount, any kind of British presence in a land unknown to almost all British citizens for up to 40 years is a scary prospect, especially when considering the tragic fact that a further four soldiers have already lost their lives since Saturday.
The hope is that over the course of time the war on terror will be won. By giving Afghanistan back to its people, this prospect is a much more realistic one. The years ahead will be arduous for our troops out there, and they will need the undivided support of their people. The difficulty fighting a war without the support of the people has been demonstrated in conflicts throughout modern history and this task is difficult enough already.
‘We, along with the rest of the international community, are determined never to allow Afghanistan to become a safe haven for terrorists again. We are working hard towards a common goal – to develop a self-sustaining, stable and democratic Afghanistan.’
The Ministry of Defence
Please check out the Help for Heroes website (http://www.helpforheroes.org.uk/index.html). Perhaps you could even go as far as donating to this honourable charity (http://www.helpforheroes.org.uk/donations.html) or simply buying a band from the online shop to show your support for the British troops (https://www.shop.helpforheroes.org.uk/products.php?product=Help-for-Heroes-Wrist-Band).
Now that the coverage has begun to approach a level that soldiers, and indeed the general public, can be happy with, the general public are bound to form an, or adapt their, opinion on it.
A day prior to Private Hunt’s death, Sky News conducted a survey, in association with YouGov, which showed that of 2,000 adults asked about the war in Afghanistan, 35% (the majority) indicated that it is not very clear why British troops are fighting out there, while an added 20% believed that it is not clear at all. An interesting contradiction was highlighted when the same poll gave results that show 57% of those questioned are opposed to British troops fighting in Afghanistan, more than twice the number of those who believe a British presence there is justified. The results of this poll conducted last week only go to show that a scarily high percentage of British citizens do not know why there is a British presence in Afghanistan but still oppose it. Where is the sense in that?
There must be a clearly identifiable reason. If the debacle of the Iraq war taught the Labour party anything, it was that the British people will not be duped into supporting an unjustifiable war ever again. Fool us once; shame on you, fool us twice; shame on us. Hence Shadow Defence Secretary Dr Liam Fox’s recent letter to Defence Secretary Bob Ainsworth which “demands clarification on [the] British mission in Afghanistan”. This letter, as noble a gesture as it may seem, stinks of another Conservative effort to further embarrass Labour, were it to be revealed that we have another WMD scenario on our hands, thereby making the Tories look better by default, and may not actually provide the people of Britain with the information they so desperately need and deserve.
So, why are British troops fighting in Afghanistan?
There are a handful of recent historical events that proffer such questions as ‘Where were you when...?’ and the like. If that ellipsis were to be replaced by just three numbers and one small slice of punctuation though, almost all of us would be able to blurt out an answer which seemingly shows that while planes were crashing and thousands of people were dying, we were going about our daily business in blissful ignorance.
The section of the Ministry Defence website entitled ‘Operations in Afghanistan: Background Briefing 1’ begins with the following: ‘Following the terrorist attacks on Washington and New York on 11 September 2001…’ And that is why Britain became involved in Afghanistan. Our nation stood shoulder to shoulder with the US as it looked to react to the awful events that took place on 9/11.
Much of us are easily convinced that retaliating to the terrorist attacks on the World Trade Centre and the Pentagon is more than enough reason to justify British troops being in Afghanistan. However, factions of the general public will be quick to point out that we don’t need to get involved in ‘someone else’s fight’ (that quote is so common in conversations about British military endeavours in recent history that it is approaching being categorised as cliché). These people would be well reminded of another date infamous enough to be granted with a numerical moniker supposed to encapsulate all connotations of pain, destruction and death caused by evil – 7 July 2005, the day of the London terrorist attacks. Also, in talk held with the intelligence of conversation usually reserved for drunken pub chat, the US is often accused of only getting involved in the Second World War when the country felt the effects of it on a personal level, with the Japanese attack on Pearl Harbour. A fine display of hypocrisy it is then to say that the British reaction to 9/11 was not justified.
That reaction was the beginning of Operation Veritas, a campaign against international terrorism, initialised with the identification of denying Al Qaida a base in Afghanistan, denying them an alternative base elsewhere, attacking Al Qaida internationally, and supporting other states in their efforts against Al Qaida as the four main goals of the operation.
In November 2001, the Royal Marines from 40 Commando became the first British troops sent into Afghanistan and were quickly followed by a large battle group based around Royal Marines from 45 Commando. Their role as Task Force Jacana was to ‘deny and destroy terrorist infrastructure and interdict the movement of Al Qaida in eastern Afghanistan’, more broadly, they were part of a US-led coalition force designed to dislodge the Taliban which was sheltering Al Qaida. This aim was quickly fulfilled. By the end of the year the Taliban had collapsed. Those who remained were forced into retreating to the Pushtan province of southern Afghanistan and Pakistani tribal areas. However, international forces remained in Afghanistan to prevent the country from falling back into the hands of those seeking to use it as a hotbed for the grooming of potential terrorists, thereby providing much needed stability. While present in Afghanistan, British forces were given the tasks of seeking out hidden factions of the Taliban and Al Qaida and training Afghan security forces to defend their own country against such threats.
So, the original reason for the British troops being in Afghanistan was to help get rid of Al Qaida and the Taliban, but having done that, simply deciding to cut and run was not, and is still not, an option, as this would leave Afghanistan open for resurgent enemy forces to reclaim. Therefore, the aim now is to protect Afghanistan and allow the nation to become self-sustaining, stable and, most importantly to NATO, democratic.
As Afghanistan gears up to the elections this week, only the second time they have voted for a leader in their history, British forces will play a huge part in making sure they go smoothly. The establishment of a democracy in Afghanistan is the most crucial goal for the International Security Assistance Force (ISAF) that the United Kingdom currently contributes approximately 9,000 troops towards. However, a democracy is not a desirable situation for all, especially the Taliban, who initially enjoyed popularity when coming to prominence in the country in 1994 but have, of course, since been driven out and reduced to insurgency.
When British forces moved into the Taliban stronghold of Helmand in 2006 they were met with brutal resistance, in the form of head-on attacks, straight away. Three years on, soldiers no longer have to face such bold tactics, but instead face the constant threat of Improvised Explosive Devices (IEDs). IEDs are morally degrading for the ISAF troops because they are hard to find and extremely lethal, but still cheap and easy for the enemy to produce, giving the Taliban the option of laying ten IEDs in the hope that just one will devastate a British patrol. Soldiers also face the added problem of identifying the Taliban insurgents amongst the civilians they come across.
With these facts in mind, the question on everyone’s lips should not be about why British troops are fighting in Afghanistan, but instead how much longer they must do so. On this subject the Chief of General Staff (head of the Army) General Sir David Richards has said that “the whole process might take as long as 30 to 40 years” when speaking earlier this month. Although he went on to say that the number of troops British forces contribute during that time will not always be as high as the current amount, any kind of British presence in a land unknown to almost all British citizens for up to 40 years is a scary prospect, especially when considering the tragic fact that a further four soldiers have already lost their lives since Saturday.
The hope is that over the course of time the war on terror will be won. By giving Afghanistan back to its people, this prospect is a much more realistic one. The years ahead will be arduous for our troops out there, and they will need the undivided support of their people. The difficulty fighting a war without the support of the people has been demonstrated in conflicts throughout modern history and this task is difficult enough already.
‘We, along with the rest of the international community, are determined never to allow Afghanistan to become a safe haven for terrorists again. We are working hard towards a common goal – to develop a self-sustaining, stable and democratic Afghanistan.’
The Ministry of Defence
Please check out the Help for Heroes website (http://www.helpforheroes.org.uk/index.html). Perhaps you could even go as far as donating to this honourable charity (http://www.helpforheroes.org.uk/donations.html) or simply buying a band from the online shop to show your support for the British troops (https://www.shop.helpforheroes.org.uk/products.php?product=Help-for-Heroes-Wrist-Band).
Wednesday 5 August 2009
So, What Now?
The following is a story written by Anon. Mr. Anon is my most favourite author of all time so I have been waiting for the chance to slip one of his stories into one of my blogs.
The Little Boy and the Promise of a Good Job
There was once a little boy who wanted a good job. He wanted a job that he would be happy in and that would provide him with enough money to ensure that he would live comfortably, having spent most of his life without much money at all.
Random Adult, one of many adults who constantly told the little boy what he should do, said, “Go to school little boy, get good GCSEs so that you can go to college or Sixth Form. You need qualifications to get a good job.”
To which the little boy replied, “Okay, Random Adult, I will do that.”
So the little boy went to school and eventually gained enough GCSEs to get into Sixth Form College. By the time he had done this he wasn’t little any more.
As he was about to start his A-Levels, Random Adult told the boy, “Go to Sixth Form boy, get good A-Levels so that you can go to university. You need qualifications to get a good job.”
To which the boy replied, “Okay, Random Adult, I will do that.”
So the boy went to sixth form and eventually gained enough A-Levels to get into university. By the time he had done this he was more of a lad than a boy.
As he was about to start his degree, Random Adult told the lad, “Go to university lad, get a degree so that you can get a good job. You need qualifications to get a good job.”
To which the boy replied, “Okay, Random Adult, I will do that.”
So the boy went to university and eventually gained a degree that he thought would get him a good job.
But, when the lad went to get a good job he was confronted by The Man, that is the person who decides who has a good job and who does not.
“You can not have a good job,” The Man told the lad, “You should have been working. You need experience to get a good job.”
And so the little boy had wasted his time on education.
That’s just a little tale to show how sorry I’m feeling for myself at the moment. Nothing like a bit of good old self-pity to start an exhilarating blog with eh?
Since I have graduated I have found it quite hard to find a job that puts my degree to use (like most graduates unfortunate enough to be part of the class of 2009), so I’ve basically written this to inform anyone who cares that I’m going to carry on writing my blogs soon. My plan is to pick one story every week and blog about it. I may even write more often if there are enough stories for me to draw inspiration from. You may know that I have made such plans before and they have not happened, partly because of uni work and partly because of laziness. But the former excuse is no longer a problem, and I am, paradoxically, working on the latter – surely working on your laziness must prove that you aren’t actually that lazy?
This is all a small (but crucial) part of my big plan to ‘stick it to The Man’ and get that good job the little boy was promised by Random Adult (there’s a perverted sentence if ever there was one). Other parts of the plan include working on my CV, signing up to almost every graduate recruitment website going – along with mainstream ones like fish4 and Monster – and emailing the Huddersfield uni careers department for advice, as well as talking to everyone I know who may be able to help me in my ‘Good Job Hunt’, or, as I like to call it, my ‘Gojoh’ – it has a nice Japanese feel to it.
Argos have been kind enough to take me back, so I am working there as a Delivery Assistant for now. While doing this is by no means a ‘bad’ job, it is not ‘good’ in the ways that I want it to be, mainly in that it is not putting to use my most expensive purchase to date – my degree.
So while I’m working there I will be building up my portfolio and then eventually sending out speculative job applications to various media organisations.
If you have any advice for me whatsoever, I would love to hear it.
The Little Boy and the Promise of a Good Job
There was once a little boy who wanted a good job. He wanted a job that he would be happy in and that would provide him with enough money to ensure that he would live comfortably, having spent most of his life without much money at all.
Random Adult, one of many adults who constantly told the little boy what he should do, said, “Go to school little boy, get good GCSEs so that you can go to college or Sixth Form. You need qualifications to get a good job.”
To which the little boy replied, “Okay, Random Adult, I will do that.”
So the little boy went to school and eventually gained enough GCSEs to get into Sixth Form College. By the time he had done this he wasn’t little any more.
As he was about to start his A-Levels, Random Adult told the boy, “Go to Sixth Form boy, get good A-Levels so that you can go to university. You need qualifications to get a good job.”
To which the boy replied, “Okay, Random Adult, I will do that.”
So the boy went to sixth form and eventually gained enough A-Levels to get into university. By the time he had done this he was more of a lad than a boy.
As he was about to start his degree, Random Adult told the lad, “Go to university lad, get a degree so that you can get a good job. You need qualifications to get a good job.”
To which the boy replied, “Okay, Random Adult, I will do that.”
So the boy went to university and eventually gained a degree that he thought would get him a good job.
But, when the lad went to get a good job he was confronted by The Man, that is the person who decides who has a good job and who does not.
“You can not have a good job,” The Man told the lad, “You should have been working. You need experience to get a good job.”
And so the little boy had wasted his time on education.
That’s just a little tale to show how sorry I’m feeling for myself at the moment. Nothing like a bit of good old self-pity to start an exhilarating blog with eh?
Since I have graduated I have found it quite hard to find a job that puts my degree to use (like most graduates unfortunate enough to be part of the class of 2009), so I’ve basically written this to inform anyone who cares that I’m going to carry on writing my blogs soon. My plan is to pick one story every week and blog about it. I may even write more often if there are enough stories for me to draw inspiration from. You may know that I have made such plans before and they have not happened, partly because of uni work and partly because of laziness. But the former excuse is no longer a problem, and I am, paradoxically, working on the latter – surely working on your laziness must prove that you aren’t actually that lazy?
This is all a small (but crucial) part of my big plan to ‘stick it to The Man’ and get that good job the little boy was promised by Random Adult (there’s a perverted sentence if ever there was one). Other parts of the plan include working on my CV, signing up to almost every graduate recruitment website going – along with mainstream ones like fish4 and Monster – and emailing the Huddersfield uni careers department for advice, as well as talking to everyone I know who may be able to help me in my ‘Good Job Hunt’, or, as I like to call it, my ‘Gojoh’ – it has a nice Japanese feel to it.
Argos have been kind enough to take me back, so I am working there as a Delivery Assistant for now. While doing this is by no means a ‘bad’ job, it is not ‘good’ in the ways that I want it to be, mainly in that it is not putting to use my most expensive purchase to date – my degree.
So while I’m working there I will be building up my portfolio and then eventually sending out speculative job applications to various media organisations.
If you have any advice for me whatsoever, I would love to hear it.
Another Three Bite The Dust
[This blog was written a while ago (Tuesday 26th May to be precise), I shamefully forgot to post it then]
So there we have it; another season done and dusted. Another predictable top four, or top six for that matter. The only difference in the top six of the 08/09 table from that of the 07/08 season is that Liverpool slotted into second after an unforeseen increase in their level of performance, sparked mainly by their 4-0 demolition of the club of the century, Real Madrid, in the second leg of their Champions League tie at Anfield. This was of course followed promptly by an extremely convincing victory over Manchester United at Old Trafford and many other high scoring encounters.
But, this is not to say that the top half of the table was not entertaining, what with Aston Villa seeming to have upset the apple cart early on, only to then go and tidy it up nice and neatly, making sure that Liverpool were the only apple allowed to be left out of place as the Merseyside club finally gave their similarly coloured Manchester rivals a run for their money after years of false threats.
Everton were the highlight of the season for me and should come out of it with their heads held high enough to reach the clouds – Marouane Fellaini has an obvious advantage in this endeavour – as they went through the season with a depleted squad, making strikers of Tim Cahill and the aforementioned hairy, Belgian tower. The Toffees not only secured a place in the brand-spanking new UEFA Europa League but also lined up a tasty FA Cup final with Chelsea along the way. But are Everton a team that rely upon adversity to spur them onto success? Do they need a nothing-to-lose attitude in order to lose very little? Next season will hopefully provide us with the answer, but I expect David Moyes to have the tactical nous to make a full-strength Everton challenge for another Champions League spot.
Between the top six and bottom six were a plethora of also-rans that never even threatened to get near that apple cart Villa had a momentary affair with. Teams like Spurs, Manchester City and West Ham suffered ultimately from varyingly poor starts to their campaigns that a belated surge in form could not rescue them from. But each of these mentioned sides have defended themselves by writing off the 08/09 season as a season in which they laid foundations for a brighter future. And, although I am biased in my opinion, West Ham have definitely done that, securing the signatures of hot prospects and, perhaps more importantly, the managerial duo. The bias is somewhat nullified when I say that Tottenham, under the leadership of ’Arry the former ’appy ’Ammer, have also done it.
The real interest though, lies in the darkest depths of the Premier League table, namely with West Brom, Middlesbrough and Newcastle.
The Baggies stuck to their credible footballing ethics of keeping the ball down and passing. Sadly their players were not good enough for such a philosophy to be successful and they may have found more success in employing the disgusting styles employed by Stoke and Bolton. Such is the harsh nature of the supposedly ‘beautiful’ game.
Middlesbrough are just awful. They put faith in a striker that set the Dutch league alight and suffered the inevitable consequences. If anyone at Middlesbrough has witnessed the ridiculous goings on in Holland this season – Vitesse Arnhem 6-1 FC Utrecht (in what was supposed to be a tight mid-table clash), Sparta Rotterdam 4-0 Ajax (Sparta finished 13th out of 18, and Ajax are supposed to be one of the greatest European clubs) and FC Twente 6-0 Heerenveen (Steve Mclaren’s Twente finished 2nd, but Heerenveen also finished a respectable 5th) to name just a few strange results – then they will surely see that a talent in that league needs to be taken with a pinch of salt in the Premiership, or, in the case of Afonso Alves, an unhealthy heaped tablespoon’s worth. I am glad that we will see Middlesbrough in the Championship next season, maybe then they will commit themselves fully to their commendable youth system and avoid temperamental foreign signings like the plague that they have proven to be them.
Newcastle United are a team with a monstrous fan base, and one that is full of passion and desire for success. However, a lot of Newcastle fans are easily confused in to believing that because there are a lot of them, and a big stadium has been provided for them out of necessity, they are a ‘big club’. The phrase ‘big club’ is overused to the point of cliché in modern football, but to me ‘big clubs’ are those that achieve high league positions and win trophies, and do both consistently. For this reason West Ham, Aston Villa, Tottenham Hotspur, Manchester City and definitely Newcastle United are not big club, (although Villa especially are going about changing that the right way). You can have all the money in the world, you can have a 50,000+ stadium and you can have enough fans to fill it twice, or thrice, but if the team on the pitch does not win and you do not achieve a high position in the league, or a trophy, you are not a big club. Hopefully relegation to the English football league’s second tier will allow Newcastle fans to come to grips with this fact. I expect Newcastle to bounce back from this huge low point in their history. If players follow the shining example of Damien Duff and stay at the club to undo the damage they have done, Newcastle will surely gain promotion next season and return to the Premier League reinvigorated. With the confidence of promotion they may even stride up the Premier League table in the 2010/11 season, but I’m getting ahead of myself.
Next season promises to be just as interesting as the one we have just witnessed if not more, but with England’s and Spain’s finest facing off in tomorrow night’s Champions League final, and Chelsea and Everton coming toe to toe in the FA Cup Final at Wembley on Saturday, this season is far from over, we could witness the two most entertaining games at the very end of it.
I’d love to make a prediction for each game, but that’s like trying to pin the tail on the donkey for me – I can only do it when I get a good look at the donkey when the game has begun. I just hope Man U and Barca produce a game that, unlike last year’s final, is worthy of being called the most important game in club football. Oh, and that Everton stuff Chelsea.
So there we have it; another season done and dusted. Another predictable top four, or top six for that matter. The only difference in the top six of the 08/09 table from that of the 07/08 season is that Liverpool slotted into second after an unforeseen increase in their level of performance, sparked mainly by their 4-0 demolition of the club of the century, Real Madrid, in the second leg of their Champions League tie at Anfield. This was of course followed promptly by an extremely convincing victory over Manchester United at Old Trafford and many other high scoring encounters.
But, this is not to say that the top half of the table was not entertaining, what with Aston Villa seeming to have upset the apple cart early on, only to then go and tidy it up nice and neatly, making sure that Liverpool were the only apple allowed to be left out of place as the Merseyside club finally gave their similarly coloured Manchester rivals a run for their money after years of false threats.
Everton were the highlight of the season for me and should come out of it with their heads held high enough to reach the clouds – Marouane Fellaini has an obvious advantage in this endeavour – as they went through the season with a depleted squad, making strikers of Tim Cahill and the aforementioned hairy, Belgian tower. The Toffees not only secured a place in the brand-spanking new UEFA Europa League but also lined up a tasty FA Cup final with Chelsea along the way. But are Everton a team that rely upon adversity to spur them onto success? Do they need a nothing-to-lose attitude in order to lose very little? Next season will hopefully provide us with the answer, but I expect David Moyes to have the tactical nous to make a full-strength Everton challenge for another Champions League spot.
Between the top six and bottom six were a plethora of also-rans that never even threatened to get near that apple cart Villa had a momentary affair with. Teams like Spurs, Manchester City and West Ham suffered ultimately from varyingly poor starts to their campaigns that a belated surge in form could not rescue them from. But each of these mentioned sides have defended themselves by writing off the 08/09 season as a season in which they laid foundations for a brighter future. And, although I am biased in my opinion, West Ham have definitely done that, securing the signatures of hot prospects and, perhaps more importantly, the managerial duo. The bias is somewhat nullified when I say that Tottenham, under the leadership of ’Arry the former ’appy ’Ammer, have also done it.
The real interest though, lies in the darkest depths of the Premier League table, namely with West Brom, Middlesbrough and Newcastle.
The Baggies stuck to their credible footballing ethics of keeping the ball down and passing. Sadly their players were not good enough for such a philosophy to be successful and they may have found more success in employing the disgusting styles employed by Stoke and Bolton. Such is the harsh nature of the supposedly ‘beautiful’ game.
Middlesbrough are just awful. They put faith in a striker that set the Dutch league alight and suffered the inevitable consequences. If anyone at Middlesbrough has witnessed the ridiculous goings on in Holland this season – Vitesse Arnhem 6-1 FC Utrecht (in what was supposed to be a tight mid-table clash), Sparta Rotterdam 4-0 Ajax (Sparta finished 13th out of 18, and Ajax are supposed to be one of the greatest European clubs) and FC Twente 6-0 Heerenveen (Steve Mclaren’s Twente finished 2nd, but Heerenveen also finished a respectable 5th) to name just a few strange results – then they will surely see that a talent in that league needs to be taken with a pinch of salt in the Premiership, or, in the case of Afonso Alves, an unhealthy heaped tablespoon’s worth. I am glad that we will see Middlesbrough in the Championship next season, maybe then they will commit themselves fully to their commendable youth system and avoid temperamental foreign signings like the plague that they have proven to be them.
Newcastle United are a team with a monstrous fan base, and one that is full of passion and desire for success. However, a lot of Newcastle fans are easily confused in to believing that because there are a lot of them, and a big stadium has been provided for them out of necessity, they are a ‘big club’. The phrase ‘big club’ is overused to the point of cliché in modern football, but to me ‘big clubs’ are those that achieve high league positions and win trophies, and do both consistently. For this reason West Ham, Aston Villa, Tottenham Hotspur, Manchester City and definitely Newcastle United are not big club, (although Villa especially are going about changing that the right way). You can have all the money in the world, you can have a 50,000+ stadium and you can have enough fans to fill it twice, or thrice, but if the team on the pitch does not win and you do not achieve a high position in the league, or a trophy, you are not a big club. Hopefully relegation to the English football league’s second tier will allow Newcastle fans to come to grips with this fact. I expect Newcastle to bounce back from this huge low point in their history. If players follow the shining example of Damien Duff and stay at the club to undo the damage they have done, Newcastle will surely gain promotion next season and return to the Premier League reinvigorated. With the confidence of promotion they may even stride up the Premier League table in the 2010/11 season, but I’m getting ahead of myself.
Next season promises to be just as interesting as the one we have just witnessed if not more, but with England’s and Spain’s finest facing off in tomorrow night’s Champions League final, and Chelsea and Everton coming toe to toe in the FA Cup Final at Wembley on Saturday, this season is far from over, we could witness the two most entertaining games at the very end of it.
I’d love to make a prediction for each game, but that’s like trying to pin the tail on the donkey for me – I can only do it when I get a good look at the donkey when the game has begun. I just hope Man U and Barca produce a game that, unlike last year’s final, is worthy of being called the most important game in club football. Oh, and that Everton stuff Chelsea.
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